I joined because I've never tried to loose weight before, & I thought this would be an easy way. I thought it was just fall off quickly if I made an effort. I thought I would try this online because I could do this alone. I thought I would go shopping soon for cuter, smaller clothes. I thought changing my grocery shopping was going to be more expensive. I thought changing the way I cook was going to be a difficult task since I'm a typical southern cook. I even wondered if the cost of membership was worth it, but decided I'd just give it a whirl.
& boy was I so wrong!
This has been the most amazing 2 months! I've overcome so many of those hurdles listed above that I only thought I knew. Turns out, I don't know everything! lol (My dear husband would love to know that I said that sometimes! ;) NOTHING in this life worth fighting for is an easy battle. I have learned to adjust my through this journey to adjust my thinking. I have learned that loosing weight does not equal loosing money. I have learned that just making small changes can make a big impact. I have learned that this is not a race against the clock. It is a life change to take at your own pace. Each has their own set of circumstances that they have to work out for themselves. & how do I even begin to explain how much I've needed the WW community of friends??? They've given me courage, strength, compassion, understanding, joy, & laughter-just to name a few! I would have never survived this journey thus far without them!!!
I've also learned a wealth of information about myself! Throughout the past 10 years, my life changed dramatically as I gave birth to 5 wonderful blessings. Time seemed to really step up the pace though. Life was no longer about me & what I wanted. In many ways, I was in survival mode. It was like I was swimming with all my might just to barely keep my head above the water but not going anywhere. I am a fighter, and I refused to let depression settle in. I relied on instant gratification from food more than I realized. Eating was no longer about health or hunger. It comforted me. It also settled on unwanted pounds & slowly changed the way I viewed myself before I could even comprehend what was happening. Where did that smart, fearless (& skinny) teenager disappear to? Why do I feel this way when this is exactly what I want-to get married, have children, & raise them to love the Lord? God would be displeased with the the way I feel about myself, right? Did I really want my children's mother to not even care about herself? I knew I need to invest in some major me time but strangely didn't know where to begin...
In just 2 short months, I've transformed my thinking & my way of life. I now have "me time" EVERYday! You know why? Because I need & deserve it! I've read several Valorie Burton books. She is an amazing Christian life coach. I have learned that having a negative view of myself results in me defeating me! I've reflected on the vision I have for my life. I'm seeing direction. I can focus more clearly. I realized that I can't offer anyone anything when I'm wore down ragged within myself. I couldn't teach my family about what I don't possess. I want my 3 daughters to be that same smart, determined, strong, & focused teenager that I use to be. I want my sons to know what they want in life too & have those qualities so deeply rooted with them that it becomes second nature to look for those things when seeking after love.
I'm no longer in survival mode. I'm loving & enjoying my life again! I'm seeing past all those dirty diapers, mountains of laundry, & 7 mouths to feed here. I'm enjoying the chaos that is turning into beauty everyday. I'm learning that things don't have to look perfect here. I'm learning that what others may think doesn't define me. In other words, if you are reading here & have a negative view of me, I don't care. I have released myself from your judgements that are only a reflection of your own insecurities! I'm looking for the joy in every moment of the journey. I'm tapping into those strengths that I have buried deep under "stuff" that isn't even important. I'm unearthing new opportunities. WW is more than watching the scales drop. It's dropping every weight that so easily besets us in this life. It's about regaining control & enjoying the view of our beautifully painted vision for our lives. Let's live the lives we want to live. Let's look great while we do it!
I'm 1/2 way to my goal weight! I'm loosing in inches too! I just love the charts that show it steady dropping! More than any of that, I am so thankful for the new friends I've made & the strength God has renewed in me! God has been my guide. It's NOT His will that His children perish! He is working faith, patience, determination, hard work, & JOY in my heart during this journey! If I listen closely I can almost hear Him cheering me on saying, "RUN ON! YOU CAN MAKE IT IF YOU TRY!"